When I think of a blog post to write, I always think of the title of the subject I would like to talk about first and then fill out the content. When I came up with the title for this post, I imagined it being said as a 70 year old man passing on knowledge to the next generation, with his wisdom gained from years of experience. That’s not the case. They’re just some general musings.
I’ve used this blog for many different reasons in the past. Every few months or so, I like to look back at some of the posts I’ve written to see how my mindset has changed in the past few years and to see the progression I’ve made. This blog started 3 and a half years ago when I was 24 years old and it’s been a great source of reflection.
It first started out as a bit of fun with the two others, where we could re-tell silly stories of pulling girls and having guys in the Manosphere join us on those adventures. It was all fun and games, but it soon led me to writing about the things that were most important to me and the things that I’ve held inside for many years which I couldn’t talk about with others: the quest for self improvement and ultimately, accessing the elite side of the world.
Interestingly, the comments on the posts started to dwindle with this new direction I was taking, making worldly views and mindsets more apparent to me. People want a quick fix to get to the end result of an idea, and they don’t like to be told that it’s going to take a lot of work. As I write this sentence, this blog sits on nearly 1.1 million views in total. The views are still there, but the comments, the engagement and what I thought would be a small community that separated from the manosphere with a common higher purpose, all failed to materialise. As a natural introvert, perhaps that’s for the best because it keeps the circle small. There are more spoils for us, the ones that can see a better (and achievable) calling in life.
That’s not to say that because you’re not interested in what I’m talking about, you’re wrong. It’s your life. You’re just not as right as me 😉
As a driven person, I am always looking to improve my current situation. I get itchy feet and want to be doing something to further myself otherwise I feel like I am stagnating. This has brought me to two main areas of self improvement: working out at the gym to improve my physique, and learning to trade the foreign exchange market to achieve financial independence. Two key areas of my life that have similarities but couldn’t be further apart.
I have an idea with how I want my body to look in the next three years and I work towards that every week. I make sure that I push myself harder each time I go to the gym so that I am moving forwards. The difference is extremely incremental on a week-by-week basis, but if I continue in this vein, then I will be able to look back on myself six months from now and see the improvements a lot clearer.
When it comes to trading, the principle is roughly the same. On a week-by-week basis, the improvements are minor in terms of my knowledge, almost to the point where I feel like I’m not getting anywhere. This is probably the toughest profession in the world and thus, an extremely long journey even to just competency in the field. It could take years before I can even open up a chart and feel comfortable in what I see straight away. Without physical results on a daily or weekly basis, which in this instance is obviously account growth, then it can eat at you in a way that I never thought was imaginable.
You question your value as a person. You question your intelligence. You question your confidence. You question your decision making. You question your worth. You question your decision to get on the bloody journey in the first place!
It takes great mental fortitude to be able to stick at something where the only thing leading you is blind faith, and your self confidence in your own ability. Steering the course and working at a long term plan until the end when everything seems to be constantly attacking you takes a special type of mindset. I’m not ashamed to say that there are days when I’ve felt like giving up, or there have been days where I’ve put things off through not being able to take another ego hit. It’s all part of the process, and that’s the main thing to be aware of.
The message, after all of that, that I want to get to is that you should never lose sight of the larger perspective. I’ve had many conversations with my good friend YouSoWould over this and which has led me to the subject matter of this post. If you’re studying for something, you can very easily get lost in it and fail to see the bigger picture when things are either at a high or at a low. Just as much as needing to manage yourself when you are feeling low, you need to be able to manage yourself when things are going well. You can’t get carried away with a success, whether minor or major, because just around the corner there is bound to be a sharp fall.
When that fall comes, providing you have been working hard to improve and are genuinely making progress, after 3 years you will never be as bad as you were 6 months into your new craft. You can feel low at the time, but mustn’t lose sight of everything that you have achieved which has led to the current point.
Plus, you don’t want to get carried away with a success because you’ll probably look like a twat. Stay humble and play things down. That’s what the cool kids do.
By losing sight of the bigger picture, you can fail to enjoy the things that are happening in the present. As I mentioned before, I’m always looking to improve and on the days or the weeks where I feel like I haven’t, I can get pretty low. I can obsess over the journey I’m on and feel like I’m further away from my target, but that can ruin things that are currently happening in my life. Understanding that these moments are part of a process means I can manage my mood and enjoy the little things in life along the way. Nobody goes from amateur to superstar overnight, and I must keep reminding myself that as I experience lows.
It’s important to take stock of what you have in your life rather than what you don’t have. We live in an extremely material world these days and have things thrust into our vision at every turn. You must buy this new gadget! Hey, look at this amazing car that you can’t afford! Look at this really hot girl that won’t look at you because you’re not x, y or z!
Yes, well, I’ve got a great girlfriend, a loving family, a close group of very good friends and a direction in life. As long as I continue the way I am, one day I will achieve what I set out to in life, but not at the expense of the things I have just because I’m feeling a bit crap about not having a success every day.
I hope that if you’re reading this, you can relate to what I’m saying or can take the message out of what I’m saying. As I said before, I use this blog for many reasons. Sometimes, I can help you pull a girl that you’re after with my experienced advice, I can take you around London to help you gain some confidence in talking to women, or I can help you see a better vision for your life. This post is for my own purposes, really. I would like to use it as another reference point, but also so that I can look at it and remember the advice I’m giving, so that I can keep applying it to my life.
I need to improve on managing the lows. I’m still at the start of a long road and all of these new feelings of worthlessness and indecisiveness are relatively new to me. It’s important not to give up and continue ploughing ahead, but with the right mindset and the right knowledge. I intend to do just that.
I also just needed to write down a few thoughts! Until next time.