The other day, I broke up with my Slovakian girlfriend. I didn’t want to, as she’s everything the manosphere talks about finding in terms of her femininity, beauty and her kindness, but I had to let her go.
I wrote in my post “Broken Inside Because of Oneitis?” that I was feeling disconnected from her and other girls, that I couldn’t quite bring myself around to feeling strongly for a girl.
Well, that changed temporarily the other week.
After learning about Game, how to make girls fall for me and to keep them interested, my heart has got colder and colder. I stay away from lovey dovey moments, I keep the compliments at a low and I keep my emotions very much wrapped up.
This works great for English girls. It’s what they need to stay interested and to keep chasing you. The moment you drop that frame, it all starts to go downhill for you with an English girl as she tries to take advantage of the situation by reaching for the power.
This is the frame I maintain with all girls since my oneitis, and it’s worked very well for me.
With my Slovakian, however, it was counter productive to our relationship. She fell for me a lot sooner than I thought she would and she fell for me hard. I, as I mentioned before, was quite cold about the situation and said that if she left my life the next day then it wouldn’t affect me too much.
There were a couple of times where she said to me that I had to change if I wanted to see her again because she was unhappy in the relationship with me, and she said she felt like a whore when she came round sometimes. That made me think about the way I was treating her, because I did like this girl a lot and I didn’t want her to feel that way.
A week later, her friend came up to London from the south coast, and the next day she left London to go down there. I said to her to have fun and I’ll speak to her when she’s back.
The next day, she texted me all pissed off that I hadn’t asked her why she was going down there and asked if she was okay, and all that. She told me she had to go to court about something, and when I enquired she didn’t tell me which annoyed me. So, I asked her why she brought it up if she wasn’t intending to tell me, and she said that she’ll talk to me another time.
At this point, I’m thinking to myself that I need to get rid of her. I’m not standing for this shit and she’s pulled a similar stunt a couple of other times. I’ll get her round at the weekend and end things with her.
Anyway, she comes round at the weekend, we have sex, and then I start asking her about what happened. She doesn’t want to talk about it and her body language is off. It’s like 11:30pm, and I’m lying in bed with her hugging her and she’s not reciprocating anything. I told her I’m going to cook and left her alone in bed, as I assumed it would be better if I left her alone for a bit.
I’m in the kitchen cooking and my friend and his girlfriend come home. I stay in the kitchen for about 45 minutes and then we hear the front door open. I head out to investigate and my Slovakian is all dressed up and leaving the apartment.
I stop her, she tells me that she came round to see me and I’ve left her to talk to my friends, and that the relationship isn’t working so she’s leaving. Her little face was doing the best it could to hold back the tears and it took her a lot of strength to say what she did, and my heart sank seeing what I’d done to her.
I talked her back inside and we talked about her court thing, and as she told me it, she started crying. Again, my heart sank. It was a hard sight for me, she’s an innocent, sweet girl that was giving everything to me and I’d treated her marginally better than I would a fuck buddy. That’s when it dawned on me, and I felt like a prick.
I suddenly felt responsible for how upset and unhappy she was, even though I had no idea before as to what extent she meant “unhappy”. If a girl says it to me, which they have before, it was never at the level that my Slovakian girl was using it and I took it at the same level as before. She was genuinely hurt.
This is when my feelings for her started showing and became quite intense. It hurt me seeing her this way and I said to her that I’d improve.
Over the next few days, I was different with her. More loving, more caring, more interested. I never wanted to see her be unhappy.
She comes round a few days later, we had incredible sex, and when she left, my feelings started to dissipate. The things that I wasn’t too keen on before about her were becoming clear to me again, and as we were talking over the next several days, the kinks in our relationship were coming back.
We’d planned for her to come round on Friday, and by Thursday she was acting differently with me. She’d started saying “no” to me and being cold with me after I didn’t reply to one of her texts the night before. She could tell my effort was waning, once again.
On Friday, I was expecting her to come round and she texted me at about 4pm saying she didn’t know if she was coming or not and that she had at least 10 reasons not to. I told her not to come and that we should stop seeing each other because this is the third time she’d done this to me and I could tell if we carried on, it’s just going to keep happening again and again.
I didn’t want to, but I was plunging her into misery unintentionally and I didn’t want to keep hurting her. She’d told me previously that she wanted to break up with me so many times but “I don’t know what it is but I want to stay with you”.
There was a time-bomb waiting to explode in this relationship at the end of the year anyway when I leave London to go traveling. She was aware of it, and we both knew that it would be a lot worse to break up then than to break up sooner. She said to me she knew it would be better for her when we broke up, but she didn’t want me to end it all the same.
I had to stay firm with my decision. It was the best thing for her, even with the short term hurt for us both but more specifically, for her. I hated myself all weekend for what I’d done to her and I’ve felt really shite about it all. The only solace I can take is that I’d at least improved her life a little, in that she’s now eating healthier and going to the gym to keep in shape.
It’s given me a valuable lesson about Eastern European girls. Although it’s only one case, the stories from my Bromigos and knowledge they’ve given me about Eastern European culture says to me that it won’t be the first time I’ll encounter a situation like this.
My Game is fairly linear, in the sense that I treat all girls with the same techniques and what-have-you, but this has been a slap in the face to me that in future I need to react to each girl differently. I should’ve worked what some call “beta game” with this girl to keep her happier and maybe not have this horrible sense of what wrong I did to her.
However, on the other hand, I know that had I been the kind of guy she wanted and being a lot more loving with her, it would only have been worse for her. My thoughts and focus are primarily on making money, becoming location independent and getting out of London, while I imagine that I was in her thoughts a lot. It wouldn’t have been fair on her if I play acted with her to make her happier. I guess I can live with that.
On the whole, my first experience with an Eastern European girl in a relationship has been good and a real eye opener to what is wrong with British culture. She was feminine above all else, but she had class and self respect – something lacking from the majority in this country.
It wets my appetite for my future excursions around Eastern Europe because these girls, quite simply, are wonderful.
For now though, I have another 6 months (soon to be 5, Jimmy!) before worrying about that. The thought of having a girlfriend for this time to keep me occupied until I leave was selfish but I’ve learned a hell of a lot for it. For now, I’m going to go back to doing what I do best: saving money and having lots of sex.
I’ve got the apartment to myself from Friday to Monday night, so I’m planning to make full use of it and already have two girls scheduled to come round. One is American, only a 6, but it would be a new flag. However, she might get replaced by a high 7 I’m chatting to on OKCupid (but Matt you deleted your account!!!) to compliment the other high 7 that’s coming round.