Bromigo Matt was pelvic thrusting his way through what seemed like half of the women using the OKCupid website in the London area. I thought I’d give it a little bash myself and spent some time diligently exploring what kind of profile I would need and what sort of feeler messages I’d have to send out to get responses. I already knew what not to do due to various posts on RVF and other bloggers such as Krauser and Steve Jabba.
The best way to get responses is to message women who are online so I sent a few out to various women after a quick flick through their profiles. I happened across a girl who described herself as being half Trinidadian (of Indian descent) and half German. Now, I can’t remember the content of the opening message but it revolved around Sausages and Jerk Chicken. She responded well and asked me a few questions about my cocky and arrogant profile. We exchanged a few messages back and forth before she gave me her number.
I dropped her a text the following day with a time and day for a date, a drink no less. I never do dinner dates on a first date for girls I’ve met daygaming or in bars and I’m not going to do it for a girl I’ve yet to meet. Never, ever take a girl out for dinner on the first date. It’s probably THE worst idea for a first date alongside showing her pictures of your collection of Star Wars memorabilia. She replied that she was apprehensive about meeting me and going for a drink and would have preferred a coffee date, but because of my venue date and it’s proximity to her (and me 😉 ) she was up for it. I dropped her one of Bromigo Jimmy’s lines about throwing on her best dress and heels. “It’s only Wetherspoons but ok”.
On a quite nippy and chilly Thursday night, I waltzed down to the magical Wetherspoons (for our non-UK readers it’s a pub chain which serves cheap doubles of the most popular spirits)
and she was already standing outside waiting, flowing white dress, red heels and pretty hot. Most importantly, she passed my boner test and is a solid 7 possibly thanks to her half and half combo.
Not having been on one of these before I could not care for opening etiquette. I was dressed a bit Fonz like, patented leather jacket, white tees and boots. I stuck my hand out with a cheeky smirk on my face, ‘Hey missy’ and pulled her towards me for a hug and a couple of pecks. Well that left her overawed and looking back in hindsight, sealed the deal for me.
So I led her into the magnificent low life drinking hole of the council estate lurking and dead end job holding masses and straight to the bar. She insisted on buying the drinks so I could buy her one in return. Damn, I thought you only wanted a coffee. She was still very shy as I bullshitted about my amazing day at my workplace as a dream analyser.
She knew it was bullshit but I rambled on easing her into the conversation dropping statements about her, what she was wearing, rings on her fingers, and how rasta and unshampooed her hair looked (all with a smirk, of course). I saw an opportune moment to sit alongside her rather than stand opposite her at the bar and led her over to a table. It was only 5 minutes in and I had dropped the first of Bromigo Jimmy Mac’s three step date escalation. Running smooth and the rum was running dry, she’d got herself comfy resting upon my arm telling me about her mundane weekend with her friends. I got up
Me – “Let’s go love” <hand>
Her – “Wait where are we going? You owe me a drink!” <grabs hand>
Me – “Put your coat on, it’s cold”
She complied and I led her off into the cold night towards to the tube station and she stopped me. “Wait, where are we going?” and she came up close to me. Fuck I’m always following ABC (Always Be Closing) but this takes the fucking biscuit, we’ve met for 10 minutes and she’s initiating the kiss here. Well I held off for a minute, a little bit of the classic push and pull and…. done. She hated the wait and plunged her tongue into my mouth. I pushed her off feigning that she was moving too fast, and pulled her back and gave her another little sample.
We walked over jolly to the next bar which I’d planned as part of my bounce. Logistics is king they say, and it sure is, but this presented the first obstacle of the night when she revealed her cousin owned the bar and she didn’t want to go in. Luckily I had bar three but I’d have to step up and improvise and get another bar into the equation. I temporarily forgot what area I was in and the paucity of bars. Damn, I knew of an Indian joint round the corner that was a pub/restaurant so that would have to do. We took a seat, next to each other and I dropped Bromigo Jimmy Mac’s second point of escalation which went down like wildfire and the next thing I knew the Shy Girl was now Public Display of Cock Rubbing Girl and Public Display of Receiving Pussy Rubbing Girl.
Oh lord, in an establishment like this, full of proud Indian culture who would look over disdainfully at such behaviour as they dined with their children. The leather jacket came into play and we played around and I told her the things she wanted to hear; putting sexual images into her head, projecting that these would occur between us and then pulling off into comfort as she looked at my tattoos. She was getting horny and worked, and fuck I was too. ABC ABC ABC. We finished up our drinks and let’s bounce, she complied and off we rolled waiting for a bus.
We got onto the bus and walked off in the direction of my house. I’d already told her we’d be having a drink at mine and watch some funny youtube videos my friend made. She started dropping the “I don’t normally do this kind of thing” and other phrases along them lines. We got to my front door and she stood there looking at me with a lustful gaze but didn’t move when I beckoned her in. I reiterated what we were going to do, she came towards me, put her arms around my nick, gave me a kiss and turned around and walked off. I stood there for a moment and asked her if she knew where she was going. “home, see ya”, she replied.
So where did I fuck up with this half german/half trinidadian? Comments please.
Personally I felt it was because of the overescalation verbally too early and the cold had simmered her down by the time we hit my front door and even though she enjoyed it at the time, it ruined the lay. Her anti-slut defence was strong even more so due to her cultural roots. I possibly pulled the trigger early but not bouncing her to another bar before taking her away worked against me. It’s something you learn though, failures are frustrating and great at the same time for reasons like this. Hell, I might make the same mistakes again and it will result in a lay (it’s happened before) but over analysis is not good unless you’re repeating these mistakes on a consistent basis. I was not too worried about her walking away as I’ve got a couple of plates spinning and can always find more.
half half half half half half half half half half half